Saturday, June 19, 2010

Can't go to Australia now; Demolition Man comes true.

How utterly goddamn asinine.

Australian State Bans Swearing - Hit & Run : Reason Magazine:
"Lawmakers in the Australian state of Queensland are proving just how upside down that country really is. Recently introduced legislation would allow police officers to issue on-the-spot fines of $100 AUD ($86.50) for swearing in public...
Demolition Man (film) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia:
"...even the mildest profanity is a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute, and punishable by police reprimand or a fine of one half to one credit per violation, which is automatically deducted from a citizen's finances. The perpetrator is dispensed a ticket by a machine."
Demolition Man (1993) - Memorable quotes:
"Simon Phoenix: Look I don't need a history lesson! C'mon, HAL, where are the god damn guns?
Moral Statute Machine: You are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.
Simon Phoenix: What? Fuck you!
Moral Statute Machine: Your repeated violation of the Verbal Morality Statute has caused me to notify the San Angeles Police Department. Please remain where you are for your reprimand.
Simon Phoenix: Yeah, right.
[police sirens approach]
Simon Phoenix: Fuckers are fast too.
Moral Statute Machine: You are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.
...
John Spartan: [to machine on wall after finding out that they no longer use toilet paper] Thanks a lot you shit-brained, fuck-faced, ball breaking, duck fucking pain in the ass.
Moral Statute Machine: John Spartan, you are fined five credits for repeated violations of the verbal morality statute.
John Spartan: [grabbing the tickets] So much for the seashells. See you in a few minutes."

"I appear to be a verb." - Buckminster Fuller

At least I'm pretty sure that was Fuller. Regardless, reminded me of this, below. Often different paths to the same conclusions.

HARDCORE ZEN: GREETINGS FROM THE "BAD BOY OF ZEN":
"Basically the Buddhist view of a person is not that each of us is a fixed object. A person is a set of general tendencies. And those tendencies change.

Attachment is when you start to believe that things can or should remain one way forever. That way you always relate to the same "person" as time passes.

But the people you relate to change, as you change. So your relationship with them changes. And this is never easy. But if everyone involved can accept the fact that these changes are occurring, the transitions can be easier.

Sometimes it's irreconcilable. But I think in most cases you can somehow accommodate or acclimate to the changes and carry on.

So it's not that you are attached to Allan. The "Allan" to which you are attached doesn't exist. That "Allan" is a figment of your imagination. It's an image in your mind based on past experiences and filled in with your own inventions (assumptions like "if his expression in like this he must be sad" etc.). These accumulate over time and form a picture that is easier to relate to than the real person is..."

"...then you will all be burned to death" - NewsRadio Win.

NewsRadio's one of those shows that, for whatever reason, I didn't catch when it first aired, but am watching now...  Making me a big Dave Foley fan, cause I never really followed Kids in the Hall, plus Joe Rogan, Phil Hartman & Stephen Root are all brilliant. As a straight comedy it's funny, but it gets really well done whenever it tips to the surreal.

Here's one of my favorite scenes, where you watch it go from 'normal' to paranoidically nutty at the flip of a switch. Foley's comic timing/delivery is spot on.

 

Apparently, I'm trying to eat every 7-11 tuna-mayo onigiri in Japan before I leave.

Except when I'm eating the ebi-mayo onigiri.  And drinking all the Asahi Super Dry.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Cop blows through stop signs, on cell phone, in order to get to - wait for it - Dunkin' Donuts.

You can't make this stuff up.  The jokes, they write themselves.

[See, the rules are only for the little people like you or me...]

"If he did this to a city councilman and lied about the facts…imagine what he does to average citizens" - Hit & Run : Reason Magazine:
"New York City Councilman Dan Halloran (R-Queens) watched a traffic cop blow through stop signs while talking on a cell phone and launched into hot pursuit.

...He said he followed the car as it blasted through two stop signs while weaving in and out of traffic before illegally parking in front of a Dunkin' Donuts, where the officer went to get coffee."
When confronted, the cop wrote the Councilman a ticket. Srsly.  Insane.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Been in Japan so long that a kid who graduated Jr High my first year here...

...is now student teaching at that same Jr High School as a University sophomore.  We'll ignore how that comments on how old I'm getting, and instead focus on just how amazingly cool that is.

Also, in the time I've been in Japan, they've gone through 5 Prime Ministers.  Wow, is the Japanese political system screwed up.

The munchkins are just *trying* to make me cry at this point.

Today's Jr High 2nd grader, butchering grammar, yet ensuring her place in my heart, forever.

"Robu. Africa. Go. No. Robu. Shocku. Cry."

Oh, jesus god, desperately trying to hold it together for another 6 weeks.

Yes. This. Forever. Always. - "If you really believe that death leads to eternal bliss, then why are you wearing a seatbelt?"

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Venn Diagram Enlightenment.

Today's new fun fact - somehow I'm related to TV's super-spy 'Chuck.'

Chuck, as played by Zach Levi, was born Zachary Levi Pugh.  Which means he and I are different branches off the same family tree somewhere.  Go figure.  [Is there nothing I can't learn from Wikipedia?]

Zachary Levi - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia:
"...Levi dropped his Welsh surname Pugh and uses his middle name professionally on advice that being named 'Zach Pugh' would not help his career in Hollywood."